The pieces of media that have started me on this journey

What does this mean?

These are the pieces of media that have contributed to embarking me on my journey of discovery in terms of understanding myself, the world, and challenging the norms that exist in our world. By pieces of media I mean books, movies, TV shows, games, etc. It’s entirely possible that I update this post with more things that contribute, especially when I do the remembering of things. I will not go into full depth with this list, as I intend on fully exploring these topics at a later date.

Games

• Enderal Enderal taught me a lot. It’s a free mod for Skyrim, it’s better than most games I’ve ever played, and it’s taught me so many things about Identity. An unpopular thing to take away from the game, as it’s mostly about dark psychological fantasy/a bit of horror.
• Final Fantasy Tactics Final Fantasy Tactics taught me about the truth of the world and history, and how easily history can be skewed to fit the whims of the powerful victors, how stories and information can be tweaked to align with the desires of the wealthy and upper class, how religion and ideology is often used as a tool by the few for the many, and how easily governing bodies can be corrupted by individuals.
• OneShot Oneshot single handedly changed and shaped how I feel about a thing’s ‘existence’.
• Final Fantasy XIV Final Fantasy XIV taught me the importance of death, mire, pain, and suffering, and even more so the importance of persevering through and past these things. It also partly taught me how to live my life, however I’ll get into that later.
• Final Fantasy IXFinal fantasy IX taught me the meaning and impact of death, the fleetingness of life and the importance of the presence, and especially self worth- something I’m still working on, admittedly.
• Alter Ego Alter Ego taught me philosophical introspection, the importance of balance in life, and that conformity is, unfortunately, sometimes necessary.
• Celeste Celeste is a trans gamer classic, teaching me a lot about mental health in general, finding oneself, perseverance as well, and what inner conflict can do to you, and why it’s important to accept its existence.
• Cyberpunk 2077 Cyberpunk 2077 genuinely played a large part in radicalizing me to leftist ideologies, helping me understand the disgusting underbelly of all corporations, as well as a lesson and understanding similar to that of enderal, about identity and self understanding.

Shows, Anime, and Movies

• Cyberpunk: Edgerunners Cyberpunk Edgerunners taught me what hiding information from your partner can do, even if you’re trying to protect them, and especially hiding things from yourself. it’s a cautionary tale as much as it is the recounting of a legend of night city.
• BoJack Horseman Bojack Horseman to this day remains in my opinion the best animated show to ever exist, possibly the best show in general to ever exist. It paints perfectly the messiness of real life mental health issues, and has taught me more lessons than I could ever possibly count.
• Better Call Saul Better Call Saul almost single handedly taught me the messy grey areas of morality, and how just calling something ‘justified’ ‘moral’ or ‘right’ does not mean they are good things; nor are they interchangeable.
• How I Met Your MotherHow I met your mother genuinely taught and showed me so much about relationships, life, and love. And especially nostalgia. To this day it remains one of my favourite shows, not just because of the themes and lessons mentioned above, but also because of its beautiful mastery over the sitcom genre. I hate sitcoms, and I loved this show.
• Frieren: Beyond Journey’s End Frieren: Beyond Journey’s end: I have so much to say about this show because it’s truly magnificent. I could not do it justice by listing off the things it’s taught me, it’s likely to become one of the main talking points I do here. But I will say that it has deeply shaped my personality and the way I understand people.
• Spirited AwaySpirited Away really solidified my love for ghibli films and their antagonists, as it paints a terribly evil ‘villain’, and then treats them with nothing but kindness, acceptance, and compassion. Its message is to not punish and hurt and kill broken people, but to show them how to be better.
• Princess Mononoke Princess Mononoke still has similar antagonist themes, but it really genuinely shows such beautiful nuanced conflict, the reality of humans and nature coexisting, and it taught me the kind of balanced mindset truly needed to heal the earth, as well as allowed me to understand anthropocentrism.
• Kiki’s Delivery ServiceKiki’s delivery service may not be the best ghibli film, but the reality and society it presents is just pure. In most films, the society and cities and nations and culture it paints is usually flawed, and is there to act as another challenge for the protagonist, but Kiki’s delivery service shows that this isn’t necessary, and definitely shouldn’t be always seen.

Literature

• The Belgariad The Belgariad: To this day my favourite book series of all time, and while I don’t necessarily like the western theme of conflict as ‘good vs evil’, ‘light vs dark’, ‘ingroup vs other’. But this series in my opinion does it the best, and still in a rather nuanced way compared to most disney movies and other western literature. It paints a very simple picture: ‘We are fighting so that everyone may live, they are fighting so that everyone may die.’ It’s a cosmic conflict of absolute chaos vs regulated order. This is better than just ‘I am evil cuz I am and I hate you grrr’. I’m not saying that’s bad- Disney villains and villains written like this are extremely compelling and do still exist in the real world, it’s just The Belgariad is what first opened my eyes to this reality.
• Magnus Chase Magnus Chase really shaped my personality and understanding of the importance of empathy, as well as relationships and love. It carries really strong themes of found family and rejection of blood family, something I DEEPLY relate to and it helped me understand that concept.
• Percy Jackson Percy Jackson was one of the first series’ I ever read, and it really taught me how sometimes wanting and wishing the best and trying to do your best isn’t the best option. It also taught me that being weird and an outcast isn’t always a bad thing, and that there’s strengths within weaknesses.
• No Longer Human No longer human is another key piece of literature that sparked my interest in philosophy and existentialism, as it is a vivid and terrifying recounting of someone who was deeply suffering from mental illness.
• Always Human Finally, Always Human remains my favourite webtoon of all time, as it rivals many other works of literature. One of the main things it taught me was that you shouldn’t reduce someone to their struggles, as although they might be struggling, it’s true, that you shouldn’t try to understand someone’s pain through empathy and support, as that can often lead to making it about yourself, and not them. It shows that chronic illness or disabilities aren't things to be pitied and attempted to circumvent and solve, but to accept their existence and keep living.